Thursday, December 13, 2012

Offline Sources of Income Ideas for Stay at Home Women


Some women who are either constrained to stay at home to take care of the kids and the needs of the whole family are not contented playing just plain housewives.  They also want to have a source of income either for personal necessities or, due to the rising cost of living, to augment the family earnings and contribute to the household’s financial needs.

In looking for means to earn a living at the comfort of home, a lot have resorted to searching means to earn online but if one lacks the skills and the technical knowledge, this is not an easy task.  As someone equipped with just an ordinary computer know-how  the earnings from online sites mostly does not compensate for the time spent plus the risk of being scammed.  Hence, if you are not a computer wizard and wants to earn within the confines of your home, engaging in offline activities would bring in more cash than trying to find it online at this stage.   You may also however make use of the internet  in these offline activities.  And to those who have no inkling where to start here are some ideas to take a crack at.

Make use of your skills.  Like, if you are good in baking, bake products you are good at and offer samples to friends and acquaintances and let them know that you accept orders.  Compute total cost and expenses, consider your labor, add a reasonable mark-up then set the selling price.  Offer discounts for volume orders to boast sales. 

You may also make most of a talent that you do extremely well.  A friend who has a knack for convincing people is earning by looking for seller or buyer of whatever item one  wants to dispose of or in need.   She uses free classified ads websites for advertising and then do follow-ups and negotiations mostly by phone with the client and her contacts and earn commission when the sale is finalized sometimes not only from the seller but from the buyer as well.    

Find something in your area for possible works that could be brought and done at home.  I have a neighbour who accepts consignment works for decorative handicraft products where she is supplied with all the materials and paid based on per piece completed products.  Normally this one requires a short training in the beginning.

Transform your hobbies or find a hobby of your interest and turn this into an income generating activity.  Examples are needle crafts where you may create an assortment of fancy pieces for various purposes and show these to friends as samples or take photos of your finished products and advertise these online.  If you don’t possess a skill that could possibly provide an income look for training centers that offers short courses on a variety of skills and select one that would appeal to you or you think you would enjoy doing.  Sometimes, there are organizations that offer free training for this purpose.

There are also skills that could be learned online, just do some searching and you may find something that you could do and offer your finish product for sale.  A friend learned how to bake a delicious brownie by searching the recipe and procedure online and is now earning from this activity.  

In our country, community stores locally called “sari-sari stores” are found almost everywhere and for a stay at home person this is also a good source of income.   Store owners buy merchandise mostly food and basic home needs by volume at groceries and sell these in the neighborhood with mark-up. They allocate a part within the house where to display the goods.  Customers are neighbors who either have no time for marketing or find it impractical to buy things at the groceries when they only had limited cash on hand to buy their daily needs.  One downside in this type of business is collection problems for credit sales hence, a cash payment is ideal but if it could not be avoided, be smart in determining whom to extend credit.

There are many other possibilities and the most viable is offering something for sale.  Just look around your neighborhood to find possible opportunities.   A delicious homemade ice candy had helped a widow’s daughter finish college.  How?  They live just across the street where a highly populated private school is located and the widow’s products had appealed to the taste not only of the students but those of non students as well.

You could engage in these activities within the confines of your home and although some aspects require that you have to go out of the house at times but this only means that you will be doing it for a brief period.  In between, squeeze in your online pursuits either for fun, stress therapy or additional resource to enhance your income on these offline activities like promoting your products or services on websites that offers free advertising. 

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Questions About Life’s Ordeals and Possible Rationalization ….


Often times we are experiencing disappointments resulting from trials that are difficult to accept.  These besiege our thoughts with queries that are difficult to unravel and only the Lord could provide the best answers.  Below are some of common life issues with assumed explanations from personal experiences and accounts of people I know that had helped the afflicted one understand, accept and move on from similar situations. 

When intrigues had inflicted and humiliated a person unjustly
Question - Why people are cruel even when you have not done them wrong?
 Answer  - The Lord may want us to discover who our real friends are who would believe, accept, and stand by us whoever we are and whatever the situation is.

When faced with various trials and is at a loss of what to do
Question - What have I done to deserve this?
Answer   - The Lord may want us to learn from adversity so as to develop our character and make us a stronger, wiser and a better person.

When afflicted with an ailment whose pains are too much to bear 
Question - Lord why had you allowed this to happen to me?
Answer   - Perhaps the Lord wants us to realize how precious life is and the glory of the life beyond and, that He wants us to share it with Him for eternity.

When you strive to be on top or the best but fail to be a winner most of the time 
Question - Why could I not win and be number one?
Answer   - Being number and on top may make us feel very important and would not need God anymore.   But when we are not, we realize that we need God and recognize His importance in our lives.

When suffering from a great loss and had been abandoned by the persons expected to be allies or people that could be depended to 
Question - Lord what have I done to deserve this?
Answer   - If everything and everyone else is gone, the Lord is still there anytime, anyplace and anywhere when needed for He is just a prayer away.  

And, applying gratitude to our daily life by being thankful of the things that we have and enjoy will help ease pains and disappointments.  A simple prayer like “Lord I may not understand what is happening to my life now, but thank you for the provisions that I still have.  Please take charge of the rest and help me become the person you want me to be” will help you get through.




Friday, December 7, 2012

Surviving An Accident Trauma


This incident happened three decades ago but had created a phobia that will affect me for life.

It took place when I was working in a semi exclusive resort complex which could only be accessed by authorized utility and private vehicles with resort stickers and guests’ cars with confirmed reservations.   Hence, if you miss the schedule of the employee’s shuttle going in and out of the more than thirty hectares premises, means of transport is difficult unless you have your own car.  

It was the last hotel employees’ shuttle bus trip for day shift workforce which was scheduled to leave at 6:30PM and the mini bus is almost full.  The hotel where we worked is just one of the facilities within the complex, which also includes a membership club house, two separate beach fronts, residential low  rise condos and villas, golf courses and nature and mountains along the background.  Our bus had to pass a stretch of elevated roads along mountain side on the way out of the resort premises going to the town proper where most employees reside.  We were almost on the outskirts of the resort approaching plain land when we noticed that our bus was rapidly gaining instead of decreasing speed while going down the slope.  

I was setting behind the driver and sensed something was amiss so I hold on to my set and in a split second heard a loud crash and felt a shaking of our bus and then pandemonium broke loose.  Passengers are scrambling out of the bus and I heard shouting all around.  I also clambered out of the bus and once outside, I noticed my left arm dangling and likewise feel wet all over.   It was then that I realized that I am bathed with blood coming from the abrasions on my head and face caused by broken glasses and oozing from a wound just below my left shoulder.  People came to my assistance and minutes later my major wounds had been bandaged by pieces of thorn shirts of my co employees to stop the flow of blood.  They then laid me in an improvised stretcher, entered  into a car and rushed to a nearby hospital.  

It was while on the way to the hospital that I started feeling the excruciating pain and once I was brought inside I requested the first attendant for a painkiller.  I think they gave this to me promptly while they are cleaning my wounds for I start feeling numbness creeping my whole body easing the terrible pain.  A few minutes later I was again carried into the car and rushed to a bigger hospital in the city due to incomplete facilities in that small hospital. This time I recognized our company doctor (who immediately came to assist upon learning of the accident) taking charge for although I was a bit  muzzy, but, I had not lost consciousness completely.  The taking over of numbness over pain had helped and I was fervently praying to the Lord for mercy and asking Him to let me live for my eldest son who was only an infant then.  

I lost total consciousness while being treated at the hospital in the Metropolis.  I woke up in the ICU the next day finding my whole left arm in cast and my head, face and upper body in bandages and feeling great pain particularly on my left upper part.  I was told by my doctors that I was very lucky to have survived.  They got several splinters of glass that entered my body and a couple of pieces according to them were just barely an inch from a lung and my heart.  They told me that I am already out of danger but still need to undergo a major operation due to the broken bone of my left arm. My left arm was operated two weeks later and my doctors allowed me to check out after a week to recuperate at home.  

I was required to report to the hospital every  week  for close observation on the development of my operated left arm and also of the deep wound  beside my left armpit  which had not totally healed yet.   My whole arm except my hands was in plaster cast and it was uncomfortable and difficult to move and painful too at times.  This had been my plight for a couple of months and I can’t even take care of my son.  What’s more frustrating was the result of examinations of my left arm after the 2nd month which revealed a negative development.  The damaged bone did not heal as expected hence I had to undergo another operation again and this time a bone grafting was done.  They took a portion from my hipbone and according to what had been explained to me this was placed between the broken bones on my left arm so that it would join and heal.  This second operation was more painful than the first for the pains which on the first was mostly felt on the upper part now affect my whole body and a little movement from any part of my body would produce a pain that really made me cry.  I stayed in the hospital again for another two weeks.


This time I had a continuous recuperation and felt the slow but sure improvement of my left arm.  After the operated bone had healed it took me again another two months of physical therapy to help my left arm and fingers move again.  The capacity however had been unlike before and it took me almost a year before I could be able to use it normally again but capability is not as before.   I was supposed to undergo another operation a year later after complete recovery to remove the metal support placed on the bone of my left arm but the pains I had suffered had scared me of undergoing any operation again.  Hence, until today the metal support is still inside enveloping my upper left arm bone and with God’s grace, this has not created any discomfort.  

Now years after, my left arm had completely recovered and functions normally as if nothing happened.  Only the visible scars showed the traces of what I had gone through.  That accident however had a lifelong effect that I think I will not be able to get over anymore, and that is, my phobia for fast running vehicles and also even for sea and land transport.  Whenever I’m on board a fast vehicle I can’t help getting jittery and would rather prefer to get off and find another means to reach my destination.  Before the accident, I love fast travel but now my travel motto is “Better delayed but arrive safe than go fast and assume risk.”  

Life Outside of My Window One Cloudy Afternoon


It’s only three o’clock in the afternoon but the sun had totally hidden its rays.  The ambiance around was a picture of gloominess and without a watch to consult to you would assume it’s almost twilight time.

It was a boring afternoon and I was not in the mood of doing anything.   With nothing to keep me occupied at hand I decided to make an observation on the flow of life within the area where we live and out of a foolish notion I decided to take note of the activities observed. 

Not farther away which I presumed is coming from the basketball court which is not within my eye’s vision I could hear the shrieks and laughter of children playing and shouting unmindful of the misty surroundings.  Then came the shouts of a trike (a three wheel local transport for short distance travel) driver calling for passengers going out of our subdivision.  A lady in white and blue with a child in tow responded to his call. 

A husband and wife with their two year old son passed by heading toward the direction of the basketball court.  If you’re wondering how I knew the age of the child, it’s because the couple and their son are regular customers of my small variety store.  Then a man in yellow shirt riding a bike passed by going out of our subdivision.  I heard a roar of a coming motorbike and minutes later a blue motorcycle with two riders entered the subdivision gate.  Then two trikes loaded with two passengers each passed on the way out of the subdivision followed by a motorbike again driven by a man with a lady student as back rider. 

Two houses away three women neighbors are huddled together in what seems to be a very enjoyable exchange of conversations as I can see them laughing merrily from time to time.

Along the small creek located on the opposite side of the road near our house were several children who were walking along the edge of the riverbank searching for I don’t know what on the water below.

People walking also kept on coming in and going out of the subdivision.  Some of those coming in are holding plastic bags mostly transparent whose contents are food that may have been bought from a nearby “talipapa” (local term for a small market) intended to be prepared for dinner while some are just plainly walking while conversing with one another.  There were also students in their school uniforms who I presume are already on their way home.

These activities kept on going on all the time, trikes, motorcycles and cars coming in and out of our small neighborhood and, also the flow in and out of people walking.  

This is the daily course of life within our area which is a run of the mill occurrence and could not be considered interesting in any angle but had made me pass a couple of hours unnoticed and somehow assuage my uneasiness and boredom for the afternoon. 

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Healing After A Breakup


Broken relationship is perhaps one of the most difficult challenge to triumph over in life, a benchmark that once overcome would make the survivor more equipped and sturdier in facing other trials to survive.

The hardest phase after breaking up is the process of healing.  Normally, the party who is deeply hurt and affected is the aggrieved one who due to physical, mental and emotional pains is totally lost how to start picking up the pieces and starting all over again. 

Healing starts after acceptance.  That is, acceptance that the relationship has come to an end, that the situation is real and you will now have to face the consequences alone.  To start out, avoid expecting that your partner will listen to his conscience and return as this will only establish false hopes and lengthen the agony of waiting for something to turn out right when his behaviors or attitude before the breakup had proven otherwise.

Face the reality that you are now on your own and set out living by yourself or with your children if you have.   Consider the welfare of the people around you and those who will be affected by your misery.   Analyze the situation, strive to live peacefully, acknowledge that life is very precious and believe that you have the capacity to improve your fate by not depending on someone else.  Plan your life and implement what you conceive as appropriate corrections and support these with actions.  Be firm but play fair in your decisions and, most of all, pray and expect for God’s grace to help you through.

The saying “Time heal all wounds” is very true.  In the earlier stage when the pains are at their worst, you may seem to loss hope but don’t let this fool you.  Avoid wallowing in desolation for it will never help but on the contrary may promote self pity and lead to loss of self esteem.   Start getting busy with positive and productive activities.  Let time pass by engaging in actions backed up by plans and firm decision.  You may experience the first longest year in your life at this time, but looking back after the first anniversary will make you realize a considerable change in yourself and realizing this, the subsequent years will seem to be passing fast and you can feel that these are now smoother episodes to go through.  

Although this may not adapt to all cases but to some survivors, they came to realize years later that what seemed then to be an unbearable turning point in their lives have worked on their favor.   I can affirm the same not through material gauge but more on the peace and contentment that I now enjoy through the grace of our Lord.

Motorcycle Driving, Its Advantages and Hazards


Motorcycles are everywhere in the metropolis.  Streets including highways are teeming with these vehicles daily, so are the lanes and roads in the provinces.

This type of land transport have become very popular primarily due to:
  • It is cheaper and easily affordable to an average income earner
  • Low fuel consumption compared to other vehicles thus, a big cut on fuel expenses.
  • Easier to navigate even in  rough roads and  narrow places. 
  • Its size makes travel easier and faster in traffic congested streets and avenues of the metropolis.  
  • Lesser parking need as it only requires a very minimal space.
These rationales had boost up the sale of motorcycles.  But upshot of this increase in motorcycle ownership is a step up in road mishaps involving these vehicles.  Government had been adapting measures to prevent these accidents like providing motorcycle lanes in every major thoroughfare and requiring use of government approved standard safety helmets yet there are still motorcycle accident reports in the news almost every day.  Sadly, most of these are not attributable to machine defects but mostly due to human errors, like drunkenness, driver’s arrogance, hardheadedness and non observation of traffic rules and regulations. 

Some of these mishaps even involve unlicensed minors who once aboard a motorcycle are experiencing an extra high feeling that makes them oblivious of the risks of fast driving and the damage it may bring on their lives and on the lives and properties of others.  Sample case is the attitude of some youths in our neighborhood who would drive their roaring motorcycles at high speed unmindful of the dangers they pose to residents of the place particularly to children who play on the side of the streets.  There are cases too where a family of three to four composed of the father, mother and children are all passengers of a single vehicle where some members usually the children are without protective helmets.  Although this practice is not tolerated in the highways and main thoroughfares but this sight is common on inner streets where no traffic enforcers are posted.

A motorcycle is a very light vehicle where the rider’s only protection against harm in cases of an accident is helmet that could only protect the head and not the whole body.  Owners should exercise sense of conscientiousness to ensure not only its passenger’s safety but that of third parties too that may suffer for this carelessness.  A little indiscretion would mean damage to or loss of life hence it would do more good if every hazard safeguard  are exercised and  traffic rules and regulations are diligently observed. 

It would be preferable to be bothered by observing the “must measures for safety” than to be sorry for irreversible damage or loss resulting to carelessness and misdemeanors.  Being a responsible owner (or user) always pays for it will save not only your life but possibly also that of your love ones and third parties who are unwilling victims that had to suffer for someone’s recklessness.

Monday, December 3, 2012

The Power and Effect of Thank You


Thank you is a simple two words phrase that is frequently taken for granted nonetheless, its use or absence of use may stimulate both positive and negative reactions.

Observing the daily activities of life around us, one could not help but notice that a lot of people had discarded the practice of saying these words as a show of appreciation whenever a favor had been received, extended or granted to them no matter how trivial it may seem. 

In a ‘filled to capacity’ public utility vehicles  I often witness incidents where someone offers a seat to somebody who is less physically fit or assist a fellow passenger particularly those with baggage in boarding or alighting the vehicle  but recipient did not spare even a second to acknowledge the courtesy extended.  In our country where community stores flourish, it is common for anybody to walk in and request for a bigger bill to be changed to smaller denominations, ask for a cigarette to be lighted, seek for directions or information and, someone asking for material help or begging for something and just walk away after their purpose was achieved.   These cases and many other acts of kindness may seem insignificant but as someone who had been extended a favor  nothing will be lost by acknowledging the act with just a simple thank you.   Although this is not a practice of the majority but it is somewhat disappointing to witness a lack of appreciation for whatever concern or aid someone has made over somebody.

Thank you may seem inconsequential to some but if we just have to analyze its effect we will realize its value and impact to both parties.

 Neglecting to say a simple “thank you” may:
-      Deter further favor  from the persons who have realized the receiver’s character. 
-      Change people’s outlook towards extending assistance as display of ungratefulness is an effective tool to discourage not only the benefactor but also the witnesses in upholding a “good Samaritan” practice.
-      Result to loss of respect for someone who is consistent in doing this.

Saying a simple thank you for ordinary gestures and favors received would:
-      Uplift the spirit of the donor as knowing that someone appreciates what you have done also feels gratifying.
-      Inspire donor or volunteer to do or share more of what he could spare.
-      Promote admiration, trust and respect towards the person who knows how to appreciate.

Generosity, be it material, physical of even emotional in form is not an obligation but a voluntary act from the person who extends it.  If the act is sincere in nature sans any ulterior motive, the donor does not expect a repayment or any benefit from doing it.   But it does not mean however that this would be sufficient rationale for showing ingratitude to someone who had intended something good for your welfare no matter how petty is the amount involve or the effort made.  A sincere thank you will only cost you few seconds to utter and this would more than compensate for the affection that had been extended and will likewise develop a positive attitude both to the giver and the receiver if constantly put into practice.

Political Dynasties How And When Will It End?


Clans have governed most places in our country and despite the prohibition of a political dynasty in our constitution this practice had gained roots and control on their respective areas for decades.

As politics is starting to heat up due to the coming national election next year, political clans are now again making their presence felt all over the country.  In some places not only one member of a family has filed for candidacy but several members from grandparents to parents to children, cousins, uncles, aunties and in laws are vying for various local and national positions in the government brandishing the political dynasty defense of “let the people choose” against criticisms hurled on their un-ending quest for political power.   And worst is, family members who cannot make it to regular positions have managed to encroach into party list representative positions which are supposed to be allotted only for marginalized sectors of our society.

Our constitution has a provision against political dynasty but the lack of enabling laws had made this provision ineffective.  And the ones who should set the rules pertaining to this provision are our lawmakers from the lower and upper houses of congress whose members are mostly coming from various political clans throughout the whole Philippine archipelago.  Hence, it would be like aiming for the moon to expect that they will initiate and sincerely exert efforts to create an enabling law that will limit or put an end to this practise.   With this fact could we anticipate them to heed their conscience and create a law that would hinder or bring to an end their reign and easy access to financial gain?

It is true that decision is on the hands of the people but it would be a herculean task for a deserving newcomer to stand up in a competition when all the odds are against him.  The clans in power has control of the political machinery,  the clout and the money that will make an unknown fade into insignificance even before the political battle heats up.  In places particularly in remote provinces where the lands and  livelihood resources  are almost owned and controlled  by families and relatives of these political clans, the people’s right to choose whom to vote is also under this control as doing otherwise would mean a loss of domicile and source of income  for their respective families.

Now, we only have to wonder how and when this exercise will end when the people who should set and implement the laws are thwarted by personal interests and ambitions to initiate and make decisive actions.  The unknown but deserving aspirants deserve a fair chance to compete and prove their worth but this chance are easily snuff out by the powers that rule which is, the dominance of clans who have established roots and hard-core comrades in the area for decades.

Empathy For A Mother’s Ordeal


Elaine was born from an impoverished family.  From childhood to early adulthood she struggled to survive and like any individual, dreamed of having a comfortable life too.  Thinking that having someone at her side would improve her life she plunged into marriage at an early age but it didn't take her long to realize that it was a disastrous decision.   Marriage had made her life more miserable and realizing that this partnership is turning to worst she decided to face life bravely with her kids alone.

Thus, having survived a stormy married life, Elaine was determined to do everything she could to provide a brighter future for her children.  Setting aside personal comforts and pleasures, she devoted full time priority to her children’s needs by venturing into various honest income generating resources, unmindful of other people’s opinion and at times setting aside personal pride just to make her aspirations for them come true.  Years later, her efforts paid off for all her children had been able to finish their studies and found decent and good paying jobs. 

This realization of her goal should have made the mother completely happy knowing that she had accomplished her mission and successfully survived difficult challenges.  It turned out however that her trials had not ended yet and this time she is questioning herself where she had been amiss. 

Another test that she is facing now is how to be able to withstand one of her child’s nonchalant attitude towards her.  It is painful for a wife to be taken for granted by a husband, but being treated the same by a child whom you had strive to be equipped and capable in facing life is excruciating.

I don’t intend to take sides in this situation, but, children who react this way now that they are in a much better position than the person who had made it possible for them to attain what they are now is difficult to understand.  The issue here is not the financial side but more on the lack of respect, concern, consideration and gratefulness to the one who had planned, worked selflessly, and intended nothing but a much better life for them.  Generation gap may have something to do in these parent-child conflicts and the clash in beliefs and principles had overshadowed and totally discarded the value of relationship that had been built through the years.  Association of the child with people her age who had poor relationships with parents may have some influence in the unbecoming behavior.  Somehow, it’s upsetting that a child could totally ignore a parent’s existence while living a daily normal routine, while the mother is suffering in silence for this cold treatment.   It would not be easy for anyone to understand someone’s feeling unless he had been in the same situation, and in this case, the uncompassionate child would only understand the mother’s sentiment once he become a parent himself.

No one is perfect, and if in the child’s standpoint, it was the parent who has erred, don’t the parent’s stance may also be the same?  Would it mean too much if the child would chip off a little of his pride and initiate reconciliation instead of flaunting an “I couldn't care less” front and, assert that it should be the parent who should make amend first?  A parent’s joy could not be measured by a simple display of sincere concern and thoughtfulness and it would not cost much to do this.  I only hope that it will not be too late for the child to be aware of the offhand attitude that had pained his mother. 

As children, it is preferable to make our parents feel being loved instead of causing anguish while they are still alive for once they’re gone, no amount of tears could bring back their life again.  That is, the beauty and fragrance of a bouquet of flowers could only be appreciated if the receiver could still see and smell it, but, once the recipient is gone, these flowers no matter how expensive will only rot un-admired on the place they are laid. 

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Importance of Prayer


As human beings we are weak and prone to commit errors and have limitations.  Life is full of trials and ups and downs which are impossible even for a highly intellectual person to take full control of.  These trials oftentimes are ploys that corrupt our faith and weaken our spiritual defences.  God allows things to happen to remind us of some things that we may have taken for granted or for us to get His message. We need to pray daily to be spiritually healthy and to effectively examine ourselves on how do we respond to calls and graces of God in our daily life. 

Once we discover and humbly accept that we are on the wrong zone of life, the sacrament of penance is our means or way of returning back to the right path.  If we sin, God still loves us despite the offence but we need to embrace humility first and should recognize and accept our faults and be sorry for it.  We need to open up to God and show our repentance through prayers to seek His forgiveness.  God’s love is ever-present but it won’t work automatically in our favor.  We need to seek it and ask for His grace to fully renew and strengthen our spirit.  

As human beings we need help in fighting temptations and this could only be obtained through fervent and continuous prayers.  We should learn from Jesus.  He is God and the Son of God and He don’t need to pray, but in the Holy Bible He did not only taught us but showed us the importance of prayer by setting examples in His personal practice of always taking timeout to pray to the Heavenly Father.
When praying we should strive to make our prayers come from the heart and not merely  to be recited by our lips.  Let us:
·         pray for God’s grace to make us realize and recognize our sins,
·          pray for strength, endurance and wisdom to handle life’s trials and challenges,
·         pray for our love ones and people close to us as we are all responsible for one another,
·         pray for our priests and church leaders specially those who are facing difficulties that God will supply them with strength and perseverance to take into practice their  promises to the Lord when they embraced this calling of serving His church,
·         pray for our church particularly in times where it is undergoing condemnations from outside sources and most of all,
·         let us pray for those we are not in agreement with for enlightenment and conciliation

Food and water makes the human body sturdy and capable, incessant prayers makes the human soul strong and able.

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

My Christmas Wish


We are on the “ber” months now and this means that Christmas being the most important and exciting season of the whole year for Christians is just around the corner.

Generally Christmas wish is attributed to children who depicts this season as a time of receiving gifts from people who love and care for them.  And for adults, it’s time for proper budgeting in order to properly allocate funds for gifts to be given to love ones, friends and whoever they want to share their blessings.  But now as an adult I also have a Christmas wish and pray that our Lord will find me worthy enough for this gift which I need to ask from Him. 

Abnormal season brought about by global warming had created disasters never experienced before in most part of the globe.  Our place had not been spared and the havoc that nature had brought us was in the form of flood which destroyed properties and claimed lives.  Ten years ago, a flooding story in our area would be considered a fiction but when a typhoon locally named “Ondoy” ravaged our country  on September 2009 this story had become a reality.  The wide devastation sowed terror and embedded an unpleasant memory to minds of residents that triggers anxiety once rain starts pouring heavily. 

This has resulted to my Christmas wish to have a new home in a place where we could again enjoy sleeping soundly despite heavy rain.   I want it to be located in a flood free and landslide free area, and if possible far from established earthquake faults and in a peaceful community.  I know that this wish will have to consider a lot of factors to bring this to reality and foremost is the financial capacity.  And, this is the greatest drawback for our desire of acquiring a new home now.  We want one that we could really call our own and not a rented place where our right to stay depends solely on the owner’s decision on what to do with his property.   Actually my daughter and I had already formulated a plan more than a year ago on how to make this possible but fate interfered and funds allocated for this purpose was diverted to unforeseen hospitalization expenses.  Result of this twist however is a priceless gift, a bundle of joy to all of us, the life of my son’s first baby who is the latest addition to our family.  

Rain had been recurring for days in our place now and a couple of months ago we experienced flooding again.  Although this is very much lesser and not as destructive as Ondoy but every time there is heavy rain pour so goes also the apprehension that we could not just shake off.  If raining is happening at night we could not sleep well out of fear that flood-waters may catch us offhanded.   

Last year we anticipated celebrating this year’s Christmas under a new roof on a place we have conceived but as this seems now  to be not manageable, I am now lifting up this Christmas wish into the will and grace of our Lord.  I believe that He will eventually grant this to us IN HIS TIME and know that 'His time' is just the right time for us to enjoy it.  May our Lord Jesus grant my Christmas wish IN HIS SOONEST TIME.  Merry Christmas and God bless everyone.

Television Drama Shows and Their Entertainment Impact


There are myriad of television drama shows that aim to capture audience interest with the intent of entertaining but do these shows really achieved their purpose?

Here in our country drama shows locally termed as “telenovelas” dominate the viewing schedules of top television stations as these are the most patronized shows compared to news, documentaries, sports and many others.  Themes vary from light to heavy drama, comedy, fantasy, action or a combination of these.  Heavy audience or what is considered “prime time” is during evenings hence, expect this type of shows to dominate the airtime beginning seven o clock in the evening until about a little late before midnight. 

Before, I was also addicted to these shows and there was a time when I don’t mind sleeping late at night just to be updated with the latest events of the series I am following.  Lately however, my interest had waned down and despite the luxury of having the opportunity to be able to watch my favourite telenovela anytime of the day as I am now a twenty four hours stay at home person, most of these shows does not caught my fancy anymore.  And this is due to the following dominant issues in most of these drama shows which are:
§        endless perfidious acts and wickedness of not only one but several characters that stimulate emotions of anger and hatred from the viewers
§        Unending problems and conflicts that almost depict life as continuous flow of problems and miseries
§        Unbelievable twists of episodes  that somehow makes you think as a viewer if your intelligence is being tested

These synthesis of sequences and characters are maybe aimed to highlight or increase viewers’ excitement toward the stories.  I find it however difficult to understand why create a feeling and outlook that tends to be more on the negative side just by watching these shows.  Our main purpose in watching these shows is to be amused and if what we get is a heavy  feeling by witnessing onscreen the sufferings of the main characters where then is entertainment?

Television audience covers all ages and while there are viewers classification in every show but you could not expect parents to be always available to screen or explain the impact of a particular scene which is not adaptable to younger children.  The common plot where villains in the story are endlessly planning devious means to get even or to destroy the main character is unintentionally infusing similar ideas to innocent minds of young tv watchers.   This quote “ Whatever inappropriate act an adult person has made in front of a child will be perceive as proper in the mind of the child” could also apply to shows children watch on television  without the proper guidance of an adult. 

Now, I am just hooked into a couple of drama shows.  One is a light comedy love story which creates a “feel good” mood right after watching, and the other one is a light love story with an interweaving of cultural background/history of a particular country.   I just hope that television companies would be more innovative and conceptualize shows that will really entertain without the heavy feeling and at the same time impart noteworthy ideas in the subconscious minds of innocent growing children.

Caring and Gratitude for Parents On Their Twilight Years


I came across a reality show on television featuring a sixty eight year old father whose old age brought him physical inadequacies that made him dependent to his only living son.  Unfortunately, the son and his wife maltreated the old man.

These are among the abuses done to this pitiful man who could no longer fend for himself.  He was chained like an animal inside a room, beaten, feed with food no longer fit for human consumption and abused verbally by people considered to be his immediate family.  Had it not been for the concern of some neighbors who could no longer stand the inhumanly treatment, these cruelties may have caused the untimely demise (which as it seems would be a blessing to his son and daughter in law) of the unfortunate old man.

During the confrontation the son claimed that he has secretly kept a long standing grudge against his father due to the favoritism (as he alleged) the old man had then over his other sibling (now dead)  while they were still young.  His wife reasoned out that she has more than enough tasks to attend to in her waking hours and  looking after the needs of the old man is something she could no longer manage to.  Some people from the audience including the moderators could not help shedding tears to empathize with what the poor old man had gone through.

Everyone of us and without exception will age by the passing of time.  Basing from this incident, it is important that we should be ready to face the drawbacks and inconveniences that aging brings.  But there is no foolproof formula how to prepare a secure old age as maltreatment happens not only to financially deprived persons but there are also cases of abuse to older people in families who are lavishly blessed.  It is here where family relationship comes in and counts most. 

It is true that it is parent’s obligation to take care of their children and provide them all the physical, psychological and financial help they need. It is parental responsibility too to ensure that their every child will grow up as a responsible person, an asset to society and be fully equipped to face life without expecting any remuneration.  Yes!  It is not children’s obligation to take care of their parents but, if they have the heart and the conscience, they should not let their parents rot in their old age. 

Caring should neither be a responsibility nor a show of affection for other people to appreciate and admire.  It is more of “a show of gratitude and love” to the persons who took good care of us when we were not capable yet of caring and shielding ourselves.  Caring is a priceless “thank you” to the persons who had shed blood sweat and tears to help us become the person we are now.  And who knows, what we are doing to our parents now may turn out to be manifestations of what our children will behave towards us years later.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Why Gold Jewelry for Personal Use


I am grateful to have worked in one of the well respected company based in the metropolis which is engaged in making and  selling finely handcrafted jewels made of gold and silver for a couple of years.  This had given me a firsthand basic knowledge on gold jewel processing and witnessed the interesting and intricate stages of turning a plain metal into a lovely finished product.

Gold is a precious metal that does not rust, does not change in quality of appearance and does not wear away  by frequent use and passage of  time.  It is likewise not affected by depreciation for its value appreciates over  time and is considered a good and secure investment.  Using this as basic material for a jewelry piece increases its value further.  A finely crafted jewel made of gold is a lasting work of art and deemed by the owners particularly women as moral boasters and confidence up lifters.  Despite the fact that it is expensive compared to other ornaments made from other materials yet owning one is worth the price due to its beauty and durability plus the continuous  increase in its worth.  Intricately and finely crafted ones are generally considered by many as their most precious and treasured personal collections and some very fine unique pieces owned by elite and royalties are handed down from generations to generations as heirlooms.

Value of gold jewels is appraised primarily based on the karat the setting is made of, the weight, and the quality of workmanship plus the worth of precious stones if there is.  Pure gold is classified as 24 karat and thus the number of karat of a particular piece represents the percentage of gold content of said item.  Example an 18k ring setting means that eighteen parts or 75% of total mixture is gold and six parts or 25% is alloy which is composed of other metals cheaper than gold.  A 14k gold bracelet means fourteen parts or 58.33% of its total mixture is gold and ten or 41.67% is alloy. Common alloy used in making gold jewels are silver and copper. 

In acquiring a piece of gold jewelry for personal use and investment set importance on quality which is primarily determined by these three facets:
  • The gold karat as this determines the sturdiness of the setting.   Twenty four karat gold is soft but resilient hence it is not suitable for a jewelry piece as this could be easily deformed.  Observe how a  22k gold ring or earring if used regularly  have a propensity to be out of shape particularly if the setting is thin, that is this mixture is still pliable hence, not suitable to be used as a personal accessory  if intended to be worn regularly.   For me 22k is only good for pieces intended for display and not for daily body adornment.  The ideal setting for a gold ornament intended for frequent use is 18k or 14k as settings crafted from either of these mixtures is strong enough and could not be easily deformed particularly if you want your items set with precious stones. 
  • The item’s design plays a great part too as this is considered a personality enhancer hence choose one that fits your style and will supplement your beauty.  Select a design that will be fashionable for a very long time.  You can seek the advice of your jeweler if you’re not so sure on this aspect
  • Craftsmanship is likewise important as a finely made ornament compliments the individuality and taste of the wearer.   An exquisitely  made  jewel  also command a higher price since someone with an eye for  fine jewels would not have second thoughts in choosing  a quality work  creation over  a rough one of the same carat, weight, and design notwithstanding the price difference.

Gold ornaments does not only improve one’s image and lift up the wearer’s spirit  but also affords him to be in possession of an investment that will last long after  his  lifetime.

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Life In A Jam-packed Government Office


This is a  personal observations of activities inside a crammed government office in an ordinary working day.

I have to submit a filled up form needed to update my personal records in a specific government office.  This is to facilitate the verification process relating to inquiry on my benefit claims with the said office.  This action was instigated when an ATM card issued under my account for this purpose had been cancelled.  

And this is what transpired in the process.

Day 1 – I assessed what would be the best  initial step to do, to inquire from the bank the reason behind the cancellation of my card or check with the government office first.  I opted for the latter hence, I proceeded to the concerned government  office to check why.  I  discussed  with the employee at the reception desk  the nature of my concern.  He explained that there is no need to check with the bank as instruction came from their office to suspend bank transactions in line with their records updating process. He then gave me a form to fill up and advised me to return next day as they had already issued sufficient numbers to clients who could be served for the day.

Day 2 – When I came back the following day the office is already overflowing with people.  I proceeded to the reception to ask for a number but when he checked my filled up form he instructed me to attached  a back to back photocopy of two valid Identification Cards which at the moment I had none.  My initial reaction was  to ask why this was not advised to me yesterday when I was given the form. This should have saved me time and effort  for I should have brought these requirements had I been told about it  but decided  to keep mum and left to procure these additional requirement.  It is good that I have my ID’s in my wallet and it took me almost thirty minutes to come back. This time I was given number 165 and I joined the queue of people waiting to be attended to.  I reported back at about ten thirty AM and was able to took my turn at about past two o clock PM.  That is almost four hours of waiting only to be told that there is nothing to be updated in my records as everything is in order.  The employee in charge then instructed me to check with the bank as there is no problem with my account.  Honestly I really don’t know what I had felt at that precise moment and since there is no more reason to further waste my time there I went to the bank to check.  It turned out that the bank had somewhat misclassified my account and they immediately reactivated it.

On the course of the waiting period in this office these are what I have observed:
  • Insufficient staff to attend to members’ needs.  Additional staff would have made processing of transactions faster and thus minimise cases of people coming back the following day due to  lack of staff to serve them for the day.
  • Some members upon submission of their documents were instructed to come back again due to incompleteness of requirements.  This could be minimized or avoided by a detailed checklist attached to every form to guide applicants/members on the needed requirements.
To sum up, I think it would be beneficial both to the employees and clients if our government offices would speed up the processing of documents by studying closely the area that needs to be improved.   Conducting an observations based on the “clients point of view”  on their existing policies and procedures would help them  identify bleak areas  that will enable them to implement measures and thus enhance the quality of their service.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Lament of A Weary Heart


Lord I feel so alone and lonely
Emptiness and gloom now shroud my soul
Aware that I’ve been so uncaring in so many ways
A worthless and defiant child who refused to heed your incessant calls

Lord I am so weak and shattered
By the world’s perfidious and beguiling ways
Which sucked up my strength and misted up my senses
The shackles that bounded me and pulled me down to my knees  

Lord please hear this hapless child's plea  
Enfold my restless psyche with your compassion
Open my eyes and touch and heal my callous heart
And let me feel the contentment, peace and security of your affection       

Lord, let me walk with you again
Take away my foolishness and selfish desires
Fill me up with your spiritual courage, strength and wisdom 
To be my gears and shield to overcome temptations and combat troubles
                                 
Lord, into your hands I now surrender
My fears, sorrows,   pains, my whole existence
Anxieties, greed and smugness had smashed my spirit
Blighted my acuity and showed my unworthiness beyond your kindness and love

Let this supplication be not too late
In begging for your forgiveness and mercy
Let your divine guidance and all powerful affection Oh Lord
Be my key into your kingdom and authorization to enjoy eternal grandeur

And this our Almighty God and Father
You’ve made possible for us to access
Through the sacrifice of your Son Jesus
Our Redeemer Who reigns with you forever.



Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Supporting Someone to Overpower Depression


Depression is defined as a mental state characterized by prolonged and disproportionate feeling of sadness, apathy, low-self esteem and despair.   This is a malady picking on persons of all ages, regardless of sex and race.   I am sharing these tips and ideas based on a “layman’s point of view” hoping this would help break the shackles of hopelessness and relive a more peaceful life.

This emotional state is triggered off by a myriad of causes.  Perhaps topping the list is failed relationships, then financial difficulties, physical flaws, failures in life, social inequity, and countless factors that lessen one’s zest to live.

A person is apparently suffering from this disorder if he: 
-       Is always suspicious of most people and everything around him.
-       Is always irritable and quick to anger
-       Finds it hard to get sleep or sleeps most of the time
-       Lacks appetite or has resorted to eating as a past time
-       Is either losing weight or gaining more weight  by the day
-       Is apt to notice more of the negative side of things and finds it difficult to appreciate the beauty of people and the goodness in most situations
-       Is prone to sickness and has a poor mental concentration

As the person sees himself as useless and hopeless it is all the more difficult to deal with him.  He may construe well meaning advises and attentions in a negative way hence extra care should be exercised.  

Thus to help him heal from his anxiety we need to:
-      Extend utmost understanding and patience
-      Let him feel that he is loved, important and needed
-      Help him realize his talents and positive traits and the benefits of putting these into use.
-      Help him find therapeutic activities like engaging in sports, hobbies and art that will help calm down his nerves and drive away his attention from his concerns and worries
-      Help him reach out to people
-      Make him understand the importance of seeking  psychiatric help (in worst cases)

Depression is not only self destruction but also devastation of people attached to the victim.   Strive to put meaning into his life again.  And, help him turn to God for strength and guidance.  Faith has changed countless lives for the better and our Lord is just a prayer away call on Him if you must.

Monday, September 3, 2012

A Martyr Wife’s Limitations


We have been hearing cases and were witnesses too to how wives endure physical, emotional and mental pains commonly due to the same old and overused reason that “they want to keep the marriage intact for the sake of the children.”

Sounds rational but, what do you think of these cases?

Ana has totally accepted that she could not keep her husband away from his other woman and maybe afraid too that her husband would rather give her up than this woman she has treated the situation as a normal routine of their family life.  What’s repulsive is, she and her children are financially deprived but the other woman is living comfortably courtesy of her husband.

Levy is a working mom who in her desire to make things easier and comfortable for the family hired a household help to take up on household chores only to discover months later that it was her husband’s physical  needs that she had mostly taken care of.  Result, verbal tussle which turned to physical abuse when she confronted him on this and her husband pointed the blame on her for his immoral involvement with the household helper.  And from then on she has become a dysfunctional wife to her husband as she could not do most things right in his eyes.

Another case is that of someone whose husband turned alcoholic after the birth of their second child.  Since then, her husband’s daily concern is that he has ample supply of his favourite concoctions and she had to take care of the family’s daily subsistence including the educational needs of their children.   As she is more of the quiet type it seems that she had already adapted to this arrangement to avoid arguments or squabbles in their home.

There are countless and varying cases that showcase how women bear these physical, emotional and mental abuses.  However, despite these agonies some wives would rather prefer to remain subservient to their husbands’ wishes and caprices  for:   
  • They  hope that their  husband will reform and there will be a happy ending.
  • They consider their husbands as lifeline to cling to thinking that life would be more hopeless without him.
  • Some claims that they are not ready yet to face the world alone or as a single parent but until when will they be ready?

Marriage is a partnership and for it to succeed it is vital that both parties have to contribute to make it flourish.  It is not a one sided affair where only one party is needed to keep the relationship afloat.


Wives are humans with intellect and emotions.  Sometimes however in the mayhem of physical and mental anguish they forgot to draw on intellect and let emotions take control.  They need to realize that they have a life of their own to take care of and lives of their children to protect.  They should try to be realistic and analyze and recognize the loopholes in their marital relationship. It is important for the wife to redeem her self esteem and thus realize that she can still be an effective and productive person who can do something to change and improve herself and her present situation.  She should believe in herself  and determine if until when will she and her children suffer.  Only she and no one else could fight and triumph over her own depression.   

She needs to overcome hopelessness through :  
  • Assessing her skills and strengths and everything positive about her;  
  • Counting the blessings she has and those she expects will still be coming;  
  • Talking to people she can trust and knows that will always be by her side; 
  • Recalling the joys and achievements she have had when her husband was not yet a part of her life;  
  • Always saving  something for herself.

To moms in distress, Life is beautiful and you have to appreciate it by your own eyes and not through the eyes of someone else.  Be the strength and hope of your children and prove to yourself  for their sake that you can stand firmly  with your own two feet. Again, life is good if you want it to be and coupled with faith in God it will be better - just push a little harder.


Monday, August 27, 2012

A Man Once Gives a Feast

And We The Good People Were Invited



This is an inspiration from a story in the Bible where a master prepared a feast and ordered his servants to fetch those he had invited but the servants  returned  without the guests for they refused to come for various reasons.  Angered the master ordered the servants to gather the ordinary people in the streets, the poor, the crippled and the blind or those with disabilities and any one that they meet to partake of the banquet he has prepared.

Now applying this to our daily life, God has prepared heaven as a place for us to stay once our sojourn here on earth has ended.  He had invited us to share this with him through his prophets  who showed us the way.  But people refused to listen to them hence, He sent His only Son Jesus to open the door for us to His Kingdom.   

Jesus has taught and shown us through His teachings and examples how to claim our inheritance in heaven, by the manner on how we should live as true followers of Christ.  However, because we are so busy with our earthly concerns most often we are amiss in the performance of our Christian duties and we never run out of  reasons and excuses for these neglects.  Financial concerns for families and personal growth are good reasons but these should neither stop nor prevent us from doing our duties to our church or communities.  Most often those who are blessed with greater fortune and fame (the good people who were invited) the more they become engrossed with the desire to maintain or acquire more of what they now have.  Due to cravings for more riches and power we sacrifice our Christian beliefs and values just to attain our material and earthly desires.  The insatiability for a “fine life” is the thorn that makes us waver and prevents us from entering the narrow road to salvation as Jesus has said.

The less privilege however left with very limited resources had only their faith to cling to survive.  This insufficiency is what compels them to rely on their faith to attain peace and justice.  However, their miseries are used by the Lord too to touch the conscience of “good people” who are more comfortable in life. 

Rich and poor have similar chances to be saved and bestowed with the same rights to inherit eternal glory.  It is by the degree or the position in life that we differ on how to make it.  The more blessing we receive the more responsible we should be on how to use and share it the right way. That is, the more the Lord has blessed us the more He is expecting from us.  He has bless us more so that we could bless others too, but most often we value His blessing more than His call (invitation).  

God is using a  yardstick different from human standards.  We need His wisdom to understand and discover how to prove our worth so that when our time comes to be summoned, He would gloriously meet us to share in His banquet

Friday, August 24, 2012

Barley – Its Health Benefits and How It Helped Me Live A More Active Life


This article was not written to endorse a particular product but to share the effect Barley had on me since I started using the product. The immense health benefits of barley had been initially discovered through a comprehensive study made by a Japanese scientist Dr. Yoshihide Hagiwara.  His studies established that green leaf of barley when harvested as a young grass before the ovule begins to move up and the grain to develop contains vitamins, minerals, enzymes, amino acids, and is very rich in chlorophyll.  That is, it contains the most prolific balanced supply of nutrients that exist on earth in a single source. 

Now for some of the health benefits; 
  • It is very rich in chlorophyll (the substance that give the plant its green color) a powerful antioxidant that help prevent development and proliferation of cancer cells and helps control body odor.
  •  As a great source of vitamins, minerals, enzymes and amino acids that the body needs for proper metabolism, it helps strengthen the body’s immune system and its capacity to fight against diseases.
  • It has high fiber content that help promote regular vowel movement and also good for weight loss.
  • It lowers cholesterol level and blood pressure and thus reduces risk of heart disease.
  • It is a powerful detoxifier that helps remove toxic and heavy metals from the body.
  • It increases energy levels and improves digestion.

Most herbal products claim to possess also above benefits and while it may be true for I already have been using various natural /herbal products before, barley is the one which helped me a lot.

My major health concern then was my blood pressure which at its lowest register’s at 140/90.  I always experience dizziness and fear being left alone in the house or travel alone due to this discomfort.  Minors concerns were:  I am prone to sneeze when exposed to dust, pollution or foul odors which translate to either cold or cough and at times skin rashes too.  Along with these are occasional joint pains and some bruises that appear on some parts of my body.   I began experiencing these discomforts after the age of 50.  After several consultation and taking prescribed medicines which offered immediate relief but discomforts kept coming back I resorted to alternative or herbal supplements.  Aloe vera,  bee poolen, virgen coconut oil, taheebo tea, honey, apple cider vinegar are only some of the products I had tried and they had in a way helped improved my anxieties.  Sometimes I use a combination of these products to maximize their benefits.

Then I heard how a well-known radio commentator’s blood pressure improved by using barley.  I immediately searched for its benefits in the net and likewise where to get it in our place.   I am now using it for almost two years and had stuck to it since then.  Now my BP is between 110-120/80 every time I go for check up and the minor discomforts I have mentioned above are now gone including the occasional joint pains.  It also improved my sleeping habits for I could now fall into sleep easily and sleep longer.  Only exception is occasional cold as I still sneeze sometimes if exposed to dust and pollution but not as intense as before. 

I now travel alone anytime I want to and is more energetic and active.  After taking a cup of powdered barley juice diluted in cold or plain tap water (or 2 capsules) on an empty stomach once I get up from bed every morning, I right away attend to various house chores at hand. At times I got so engrossed with what I’m doing that I forgot to follow this up with a breakfast an hour after since I don’t  easily get tired unlike before.   I can now sit longer in front of a computer  without getting dizzy and no back or shoulder pains thereafter.  These results however were not acquired overnight for I became aware of initial improvement a month later.   

How Women Moved On After a Breakup

Ways To Mend A Broken Heart


I can’t hardly sleep last night so I switch on the  radio and found myself tuned in to a program where listeners  responded to the topic of the day which is “Ways of Moving on After  a Breakup  of a Relationship.”  I want to share here some of their real life stories that I found interesting and may deserve mulling over.

One caller said that right after the breakup, she went to a parlor to have a haircut and “an appearance make over,” went shopping and, while eating alone -  watched and observed (or studied) couples actions and behaviours strolling in the mall.  She made “observing couples” anywhere a hobby and a habit and thinks that this had made her realize that the breakup was not her loss and inspired her to improve her craft and find someone better.

An office employee shared this story.  While still a student she discovered that she is sharing her boyfriend of two years with a schoolmate.  She was an honor student and this heartache had affected her studies.  She started making a novena to St. Jude and this helped her regain her determination to graduate with very good grades.  She was able to refocus her full attention to her studies (this time even better) confident that she will meet someone superior than her ex boyfriend if she will finish her studies. Now, she has a fine job with a prestigious company, is happily involved with a nice guy and they are already planning marriage sometimes next year.

One victim adapted the idea of recalling all the “not so nice moments” they had,  started analyzing the habits and attitude of her ex boyfriend which is directed mainly on his faults and incompetence and avoided  places that will remind her of him.  By these remedies she had succeeded in totally removing him from her system for a short period of time.

Someone who had felt affronted by her boyfriend’s habitual comparison of her with another woman and blatantly blaming her  for the failure of their relationship had almost lost her sense of worth.  Helpless she turned to God and joined spiritual community activities that helped her regain her self esteem.  She then started doing self evaluation and thought that despite the fact that she is not perfect she can’t agree to the accusations hurled against her.  Although it took her more than a year to recover, she is now in complete peace with herself and could not imagine living the same lifestyle she shared with her ex.

A lady now in her mid forties narrated a more sombre tale of how her boyfriend treated her as some sort of an assistant-cum-provider to attend to his needs.  Maybe unconsciously afraid that she is already on the “desperate age bracket” for she was on her late thirties then, she tried to understand and give in to his caprices hoping that he will learn to appreciate all these and give back the same level of affection.   It never worked however, and very miserable she resorted to prayers.  She said God had been her pillar of strength after the breakup and though she had remained single to date she has no regrets and is happy and contented with her present life.

One caller’s narrative that marked most was from a wife.  Her story was somehow offbeat as though this was about discord in a relationship; it did not end up to separation and main issue is how she intended to solve it.  She said that after some years of happy marriage she found out her husband’s affair with a neighbor who is close to them.  She made her husband choose between her and this other woman and when he seemed hesitant to make a decision she locked herself in their room cried heavily, prayed deeply then ironically committed suicide.  Good thing she was found immediately and was brought to the hospital in time.   She was comatose for 14 days but was lucky enough to have survived.  Her action brought her husband back to his right senses and so they tried patching up the problem and relocated to another place to start all over again. 

What she resorted to however is very foolish, dangerous and cowardly.  Committing suicide is never a solution for whatever problem.  It is very idiotic to think that this will put an end to physical, mental or whatever earthly pain which are all temporary in nature but overlooks the cost of ending your own existence (which you have no right to) in the life beyond which is eternal.  Fact is, caller disclosed that she still is not assured of her husband’s faithfulness as from time to times he has to be away from home for a day or two alleging work related reasons.  This time she prefers not to exert extra effort to investigate his activities and would rather spend her extra time to her children’s needs.

What is eminent among these testimonies is that most of these women were able to overcome the trials and able to move on by clinging on to prayers or calling on to God.  Worth pondering is the last case where she committed suicide right after praying.  Our God don’t judge us the way human do, and I think her sincere prayers had been instrumental why God granted her another chance to life, to help her realize the intensity of what she did and a chance too for eternal salvation.

I am sharing these testimonies with the hope that these will be of help to those who are on the stage of mending a broken heart.  Well meaning advises to people experiencing a broken relationship is very easy but sad to say, not that simple to execute when you are in the place of the offended person.  I’ve gone through a similar experience and just like most of the stories above it was seeking God for strength and wisdom that helped me moved on completely.