It was my grade one teacher who instilled into my consciousness the advantage of having not only all your needs but also your wants at your immediate disposal and; education as a gateway to financial advancement. I nurtured a dream to finish my studies to improve our way of life notwithstanding my parent’s capacity to make this attainable. Maybe I have held on innocently to my parent’s words that God grants the wishes of good children for I presume that I was a good child to them. The Lord granted that dream and I finished college through the efforts of my parents.
In my adolescent age or “stage of infatuations and daydreams,” I wished to end up with a loving, responsible and faithful life partner. I even proposed a situation as sign of the Lord’s approval that the person who’ll be in this circumstance is the right one. The proposed situation materialized but I did not marry that person. We were colleagues who shared various similar interests but he was four years younger than me and this fact prevented me from nurturing that romantic relationship he then wanted us to evolve to. I ended up marrying someone who possessed (it seemed to me then) the three qualities enumerated above in the courtship stage. My husband was a very caring, responsible and loving person and I felt so lucky to have married him. He was my best ally, supporter, protector and provider. That was during the early years of our married life. When our third and youngest son was born however, he started hanging out with personalities working in the entertainment field. That affected his way of life and influenced his personal preferences. He acquired vices that he shuns to before. We started disagreeing on various issues even on trivial ones. Finally, the marriage ended.
It seemed that my world had turned upside down. I was totally lost. I don’t know what to do, whom to turn to and most of all, how to raise our three kids aging 7 years, 4 years and an infant left in my care. I was really scared and confused and felt so miserable. I am a Roman Catholic Christian who prays my daily prayers and goes to church regularly on Sundays. Thinking then that I have not been remiss in my obligations as a Christian I questioned the Lord countless times why He allowed it to happen. There were even instances that I entertained doubts if God really hears and answers prayers. I sought refuge from the sympathies of friends but once I’m alone with my children depression starts setting in again. Totally helpless and hopeless I turned to the Lord again seeking strength, support and guidance to ease my mental and emotional pains. This was where I began feeling relieved and started seeing or realizing the “plus factor effects” it brought to our lives. With God’s grace my children grew up to be responsible adults.
Now my eldest son is already married and is building a family of his own. My two others kids (as I still consider them) are both young adults now. Both have completed their college studies and have decent jobs. Normal to any family, my children and I have also petty misunderstandings between us at times but these are eventually settled.
These experiences
taught me these lessons:
- If faced with uncertainties we only need Jesus to show us the way and the means to survive.
- There is more to life than what we see feel or touch. What we think is best for us may not be the case in the eyes of our God. He is the best judge who truly knows what is good for us.
- That God is using unfortunate events and people specifically close to us to make us discover the lessons He wants us to learn and the way of life he wants us to lead.
God bless everyone.
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